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Steve
11-04-06, 02:31 PM
January - Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

February - Couldn't work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn't fit
into the typewriter.

March - Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months because
the box said "2-4 years".

April - Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

May - Couldn't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit in the little packets.

June - Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - After losing in a breast stroke swimming competition, complained
to the judges that the other swimmers were using their arms.

August - Told her blonde friend to hurry when trying to get into their locked car using a coat hanger because it was starting to rain and the top was down.

September - When asked what the capital of California was: answered "C."

October - Hates M &M's because they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked a turkey for 4 days because the instructions said 1
hour per pound and she weighed 120.

December - Couldn't call 911 because there was no "11" on any phone
button.

Mom2Grace
11-04-06, 02:59 PM
Groan, groan, groan.... :S

Tommy
11-04-06, 03:01 PM
A very attractive blonde woman was too much of a hurry to get to work one morning when she was pulled over for speeding.

The officer by chance, happened to be an equally attractive woman and a blonde as well. When the officer asked the driver if she could see her operator's licence, she became a little frustrated while the driver fished around in her purse for what seemed to be several minutes. Finally, she says to the driver; "It's the little square thing with your photo on it!"

The driver driver exclaims; "This must be it!" Pulls out her make-up mirror, and hands it to the officer who takes one look at it and says; "Oh,...you can go,.........I didn't realize you were a cop!"

Heilan Mary
11-04-06, 03:02 PM
Some of them were actually quite funny and I actually laughed. :wink:

Dai Robb
11-04-06, 04:46 PM
I tell you what Steve, I am ever so glad you are here,
You make even my Jokes look Good LMAO

Steve
11-04-06, 05:26 PM
Do ye want a few more... ?

bigblaw
11-04-06, 05:38 PM
Do ye want a few more... ?

Please no..!!!

(Ok go on then)

tartaniac
11-04-06, 11:04 PM
Gotta love the blondes

Dai Robb
11-04-06, 11:42 PM
Do ye want a few more... ?


Okay by me, it takes the heat off my attempts anyway.

tartaniac
12-04-06, 07:56 PM
Only in the sanctity of a Scots based forum can we find the safety for the enjoyment of tongue-in-cheek blonde jokes while we freely admit to our beer and whisky reverance!

PLEASE PROCEED WITH MORE BLONDE JOKES! If you go to a blonde forums, they are rewriting the same jokes only we are the butt of them.

A girl came skipping home from school one day.
"Mommy, Mommy, she yelled,
"We were counting today, and all the other kids
could only count to four, but I counted to 10.
See? 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10!"
"Very good," said her
mother. "Is it because I'm blonde?" the girl asked.
"Yes, It's because you're blonde."

The next day, the girl came skipping home from
school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled,
"We were saying the alphabet today, and all
the other kids said up to D, but I said it up to G.
See? A,B,C,D,E,F,G!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes dear, it's because you're blonde."

The next day, the girl came skipping home from
school. "Mommy, Mommy!" she yelled,
"We were in gym class today, and when we
were showering, all the other girls had flat chests,
but I have these!" She lifted up her tank top
to reveal a pair of 36Cs.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm Blonde, Mommy?"
"No Honey, it's because you're 24.

Dai Robb
12-04-06, 08:54 PM
ha ha. Catherine brilliant, am definately being made redundant here with all these Jokes emerging, I Love em!!!!!

redneck
12-04-06, 09:32 PM
Yeah, a cracker. What's all this about Blondes????????? I'm quite partial to a blondie.

Dai Robb
12-04-06, 11:29 PM
Yeah, a cracker. What's all this about Blondes????????? I'm quite partial to a blondie.
Thank God I am grey, or probably it is more White than anything??:battingeyes: :battingeyes:

piper_jeff17
13-04-06, 04:15 AM
i am blonde....
but i am not that cind of blonde................. Dirty Blonde...:wink: :pint:

Dai Robb
13-04-06, 11:51 AM
i am blonde....
but i am not that cind of blonde................. Dirty Blonde...:wink: :pint:


I would be careful about making such statements on here Jeff ????